Start Swimming: Breathing Soul
by Twilight Archangel
Summary: I love my Soul because it's a part of my brother. I'm sinking alone but hopeful. Contemplating Death, it's not big deal at all. Body can die, but the Soul is inmortal. I'm catching up on you, don't leave me behind. I'll close my eyes and start swimming.


**This song brings so many feelings to me...so I wrote another version of "Start Swimming"...this version is different, again by Al but with a new point of view.  
**

**Also check out "I'll Reach You" and "A Piece Of Home"!  
**

* * *

_**Start Swimming**_

**By Delain**

_I'm waiting for another day  
I'm waiting for the clock to reach the six and twelve  
I'm waiting for a holiday  
I'm waiting for myself_

_  
I'm waiting for another day  
I'm waiting for the clock to reach the six and twelve  
I'm waiting for a holiday  
I'm waiting for myself_

_And all I seem to hear is; Stop, Stop  
I'm catching up on you  
Don't leave me behind  
I can't see a soul out here  
It's Dark, Dark  
I'm catching upon you_

_And all I wonder is; Why?  
Why do I try to keep running?  
What am I running for?_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
If I dared I'd choose to swim  
But it's safer on the shore_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
I would die to get away  
But I fear to even more_

_I'm waiting for another day  
The last one was so desperately disappointing  
I can't seem to focus on what I've done  
Or where I've been  
I can't see  
Nobody here_

_And all I seem to hear is; Stop, Stop  
I'm catching up on you  
Don't leave me behind  
I can't see a soul out here  
It's Dark, Dark  
I'm catching upon you_

_And all I wonder is; Why?  
Why do I try to keep running?  
What am I running for?_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
If I dared I'd choose to swim  
But it's safer on the shore_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
I would die to get away  
But I fear to even more_

_I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
Then close my eyes_

_I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
Then close my eyes and start swimming_

_Close my eyes and start swimming  
Close my eyes and start swimming_

* * *

**_Start Swimming: Breathing Soul_**

I'm scared.

I'm alone.

I'm sinking.

I'm drowning.

I can't breathe.

Am I going to die?

Human kind is so fragile; their lifespan is not long compared with the existence of the world, with its rotation. It's so short, so insignificant. At any moment, the eyes of a person can close and never open again. At any moment, a running person can trip, unable to stand up. At any moment, a walking person can fall, frozen.

At any moment, a laugh can turn into a cry.

At any moment, a life can turn into a death.

At any moment, a person can turn into dust.

A second is all it takes.

Human kind is so fragile, but the effort of a single person is never in vain.

I've always wondered how I would die, I wondered if one day my armor would be shattered beyond repair. I wondered if my Soul would finally reject my new body. I wondered if some blade would cut through the medium between my Soul and this world.

I rarely contemplated the greatest risk at all: My Blood Seal being washed away by the water.

I have no lungs, so I never breathe. But being in the water for long has the same effect either if I am a human being or a suit of armor, that effect is Death. My Soul being taken from the world of the living and going to whatever there is after death.

What is a Soul, but the sparkle that starts life?

So mystical, so precious, so mysterious. A Soul is the essence of the human being, and sometimes we underestimate it. We undervalue it, we don't think of it as worth as it should be. We think there is more of ourselves than a Soul.

But we're wrong.

I am a wandering Soul, waiting for his body to come back and become one again.

I'm just a Soul, nothing more.

I'm waiting for myself.

But I'm very afraid right now, because I think I'm going to die right now.

Just at any second my Blood Seal will wash away, and I will be gone.

It's not fair, drowning in some waters of sadness, some waters of despair.

Drowning in an Ocean of Tears.

I think I've lost track of time, how long have I been here drowning? How long have I been sinking in what it seems an endless, bottomless ocean? Am I sinking at all? Do I exist at all, is a Soul sinking on here?

That's kind of a stupid question, actually.

Of course I exist.

I'm incomplete.

I'm hollow.

But I exist.

I just hope that I can make myself clear these minutes I have left, each minute before the Seal is gone and then, my Soul. I hope I can understand where I come from and where I was supposed to go. Maybe I can die with a content inexistent smile in this frozen helmet while I sink.

I remember, the water, I've always been afraid of it.

When I was a child, I almost drowned to death in that river next to the forest that connected the East with Risembool. I was so excited to get into the water for first time, to be able so _**swim, **_that I didn't wait up for my older brother to help me float.

I fell, and I froze in fear.

All I could see was the chaos that was water while my lungs filled with it, killing all the oxygen and life that there was in me. The fear was the worst, and it came out of my Soul. I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life, not even when the Gate took me.

I was four, I think, when I almost die down the water.

My brother saved me, he always saves me.

Ever since that day, I've been afraid to swim.

Ever since, when I was upset I would go by the river and sit, meditating how weak I am for not being brave enough to get in and float and swim like my older brother, who I admire.

Whom I've always admired.

I should have known water was going to be the death of me.

Yet, now that I'm sinking all I want to do is swim, get to the surface and breathe. Even if I can't breathe air, I can breathe light. That Light, just seeing that light makes me reflect that I'm part of a greater Truth out there.

I can't see a soul out here, in here, it's **Dark. **

**Dark.**

I can't seem focus on anything, on what I've done, on where I've been. I see nobody here.

How did I end up drowning in here, anyway?

I'm scared.

I want my big brother.

But we don't always get what we want. I wanted a body, and now I'm going to die a suit of armor. Life can be so complicated at times, so confused, so incoherent. But that's how Life is, that is what it means. To explore the world of mystery that is all around us.

A Soul is full of emotions.

A Soul is emotions.

Mind, Body and Soul. That's what the Human is, the mix of those simple elements that compose a greater Truth, the grater Truth we are. Each one of those elements is divided by other sub elements, but the Soul is the most important one.

I'm glad my brother saved my Soul.

I can live without a Body, but I can't live without a Soul.

How would I laugh? How would I enjoy? How would I grief? How would I mourn? How would I be happy? How would I be sad?

How would I live?

Brother, do you remember why we started running? Do you remember why do we keep running at all?

I think it was because we wanted to get out bodies back, right? It was because we wanted to be normal again, to be flesh completely, right?

I need a Body too, not just my mind and my Soul.

How would I feel? How would I taste? I would I smell? How would I sleep? How would I rest? How would I…cry?

Yes, Cry.

Cry all the tears I've been wanting to release for the last four years, tears of sorrow that have been stuck in my inexistent throat, unable to leave this hollow body. I just want to be able to feel human again.

Why do I keep on running? Why am I running at all?

We are running to be happy.

That's why we shouldn't stop.

Now, all I can hear is **Stop.**

**Stop.**

I always listen the "Stop", but never care, always running. Now I need to swim. I need to swim to get out of this mess before my Blood Seal washes away and I die. My Soul can't die in here, I can't die in here.

If I was still child, I'd die deeper in.

But I'm not a child anymore; I wish I was, I really do.

But just for this one, I'll be an adult by choice and swim.

My fear is growing, I'm getting it. I'm about to die, all that thinking to myself and no one would ever listen to it. I'm about to drown in an Ocean of Tears. Is it an Ocean of Tears to begin with?

Brother… wait for me.

Save me.

Let me catch up on you, don't leave me behind.

I want to swim, but I won't think I can. I don't think I can.

I'm scared.

I want to cry, but I have no eyes to cry with.

You don't know what you have until it's gone; I may be the freak of Nature that has no Body. I miss it.

At least, I would have liked to cry on my death.

On this burning scene.

A Human's body can die, it can become dust, it can rot, it can go away and never return. It just becomes part of the nature again, that's the destiny of a human, to become dirt and be blown away by the wind. That's the Body.

But a Soul can't die.

I'm scared.

I would have liked my body, to die in my body.

I long for a body that will give me joy, I really do. I just can't keep on living as a hollow suit of armor. There are so many things I wanted to enjoy. An apple pie for example. Sleep. I just miss my body to death but…

But I'm glad to know I have a Soul real enough to live after death.

I just wish…I just wish…I could die with a Body.

I just wish I could die with a Mind.

I just wish I could die with my older brother by my side.

Edward Elric.

He is my all, he is my reason to live, and he is the reason why I haven't wiped up the Blood Seal myself. Even if my existence is incomplete, I can never, ever feel more complete when I am with my Brother.

The reason I love my Soul, is because I part of my Brother is in my Soul. That is a simple reason; we live for each other because we're all we have. We carried on for one another; we fall and stand up together, because it is our love what keeps us stable and going.

Sometimes I notice that he breathes at fast pace, and that's when I notice that he's breathing for me. We're all we've got…we're all we've got…

He is the reason why I'm running.

I'm sure right now he's finding a way to pull me out of these waters; I just hope he does it in time.

And now, he is the reason why I need to _**start swimming!**_

I can't die now!

I'm catching up on you, Ed, don't leave me behind.

If I try to swim, I'll probably sink quicker.

It's always safer on the shore.

Still, I have to try…

Stupid armor, let me swim…

Let me _**swim**_!

* * *

"Damn it, Alphonse Elric! Breathe!"

Alphonse opened his eyes and felt a terrible pressure in his lungs, he felt full. He couldn't breathe and tears were clouding his vision. He saw the blurry silhouette of his beloved golden haired brother and realized what was happened.

His lungs were full of water, begging for oxygen.

In less than a microsecond, Alphonse let out all that water that had entered his lungs. He started choking and coughing like a madman, his eyes were now bloodshot red due to the pressure of the water and fear he had felt.

He was trembling, out of both cold and fear. The last thing he remembered before waking up on the shore was gasping for air as he was swimming in the lake; he remembered panicking as he remembered the incident when he was four that he froze. Then he blacked out.

But he was alive.

He soon stopped coughing, and regained some stability on his body. Edward wrapped Alphonse in a tower and began drying his brother, who was still wet of the cold water of the river.

Al lifted his gaze and noticed Ed's wet eyes. Suddenly, with a trembling lip, the older brother embraced the younger brother with all his strength while he sobbed. "Al, you idiot! What are you trying to do? Scare me to death? I almost pee my pants! You almost drown! We fought the greatest threats in Amestris and you dare to nearly die in the water?! Nearly die on me?! Screw you, Alphonse!"

Al relaxed into the embrace and returned it. So, all the contemplations of his life were just the result of his lack of ability to stay afloat. He found that quite hilarious. He smiled. "Sorry Brother, I promise next time I won't panic. It was just that bad memory. Next time, I'll close my eyes and _**start swimming**_."

"What? You'll be lucky if I ever let you near water ever again!", exclaimed Edward with a both angry and relived tone of voice. How it hurt to be the older brother, how it hurt to love this dork so much.

And they hugged each other for a while.

Al was right on what he said, he'd rather stay there the rest of his life, on Ed's arms…then close his eyes and _**start swimming.**_

_**

* * *

Start Swimming**_

**By Delain**

_I'm waiting for another day  
I'm waiting for the clock to reach the six and twelve  
I'm waiting for a holiday  
I'm waiting for myself_

_  
I'm waiting for another day  
I'm waiting for the clock to reach the six and twelve  
I'm waiting for a holiday  
I'm waiting for myself_

_And all I seem to hear is; Stop, Stop  
I'm catching up on you  
Don't leave me behind  
I can't see a soul out here  
It's Dark, Dark  
I'm catching upon you_

_And all I wonder is; Why?  
Why do I try to keep running?  
What am I running for?_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
If I dared I'd choose to swim  
But it's safer on the shore_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
I would die to get away  
But I fear to even more_

_I'm waiting for another day  
The last one was so desperately disappointing  
I can't seem to focus on what I've done  
Or where I've been  
I can't see  
Nobody here_

_And all I seem to hear is; Stop, Stop  
I'm catching up on you  
Don't leave me behind  
I can't see a soul out here  
It's Dark, Dark  
I'm catching upon you_

_And all I wonder is; Why?  
Why do I try to keep running?  
What am I running for?_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
If I dared I'd choose to swim  
But it's safer on the shore_

_Do you remember why we started running?  
Do you remember why we're running at all?  
I would die to get away  
But I fear to even more_

_I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
Then close my eyes_

_I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
I would rather stay here the rest of my life  
Then close my eyes and start swimming_

_Close my eyes and start swimming  
Close my eyes and start swimming_


End file.
